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[Jun. 8th, 2008|04:31 pm] |
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how can a young urban albeit poor professional resist the power of buying a new macbook when her hewlett packard keels over and dies for good? huh? |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 7th, 2008|12:54 pm] |
I have become a huge airhead apparently and haven't taken any medication since wednesday and didn't realize that until now. hell yeah! going to bed at 5 am because I'm uber keyed up and then waking 12 hours later!
uh, until it's next monday and I have to start going to work.
dad is going to help me buy a new computer on sunday since the sound on mine is busted and it's generally on it's last legs. trista is in the market for a new computer and I suggested that my roommate anthan should help her out since he thinks she's real cute. hopefully, nothing gets back to eric if things go well. but they probably won't and she'll stay with her dumb boyfriend.
I guess she and I are bff's. it's a strange place to be.
I still miss liam. I'll give it until monday before I call him but it will be tough. |
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[Jun. 6th, 2008|05:49 pm] |
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liam was cleaning up my computer last night and was poking around my internet history and read the offending livejournal entry. I'm not sure I want to go into detail here about how I feel outside of the fact I have a natural instinct to call him and yet I can't act on that until he calls me. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 6th, 2008|03:30 am] |
I have a sort of flawed brain and call people I don't mean to call sometimes. not shit. I should erase some numbers from the phone. particularly that of people I've long figured out I don't like. |
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| I threw this together on a whim |
[Jun. 6th, 2008|03:04 am] |
I'm a career underachiever. I own up to that much. My college transcript says it all However, much has changed in the past three years since leaving college; I suppose out of a necessity I never had occasion to feel before in my life. I had what appeared to be a useless piece of paper that couldn't get me out of my stupid, dead-end feeling, low wage job. My GPA felt far from stellar. Would there ever be a shot of me going back to school? It has taken a long time for me to settle on an idea for what I wanted to pursue after receiving my undergraduate degree. Last in the line of pipe dreams in my long history from childhood, I applied to NYC Teaching Fellows but unsurprisingly got turned down. I decided not to apply to Teach for America. I loved New York too much in the first place even back then, and I'm not cut out for teaching anyway. At some point the germ of the idea to become a librarian started forming in my mind. I can't remember when and where; only that I've thought about it seriously for at least two years. So I'm a career underachiever; I'm a career reader also. For a decade I had trouble with this problem called skimming nearly everything I read. I can say I've over that now. I've always been big into fiction (Last author I read: Theodore Dreiser). I've read a spattering of poetry (W.H. Auden) I have liked. I developed an interest for drama while taking an "Acting for Nonmajors" during my last semester of college; it's said that Eugene O'Neill meant for "Long Day's Journey into Night" to be autobiography and I feel it's also mine. I recently read "Godel, Escher, Bach" by Douglas Hofstadter, which is a grand metaphor DNA and proposes that there is a golden eternal braid that can be found through the fields of Art, Music, and Math. The subject of the book is a historically misunderstood one and I hope Mr. Hofstadter wouldn't hate my definition too much. To sum up, I've read a wide variety of things and I confess I haven't read much besides fiction so far. However, if prodded, I'd probably read anything that would be accessible without knowing all the jargon and the hugely complicated G.E.B. actively tried to reach a broad audience. It'd be certainly nice to able to come up with a specific and unusual question about the world and have exactly the right map to find the answer. And why not be able to do that for everyone? Wouldn't that expand my horizons in much the same way I would like to have them expanded? I adore New York. I adore downtown New York in its life, broadness, depth; I look around at it for five seconds and I feel completely empowered. There is something magical in it that I cannot find in Boston, where I've lived for the last seven years; at least for me, there's something in the air that is just as stale as burnt toast left in the appliance overnight. There was something just like that feeling when Claire took me on a tour of SILS modest two floors. I want to guide other people to the depths of their curiosity, and I want Pratt to help guide myself in achieving my long sought for goal. And perhaps they will accept. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 5th, 2008|06:33 pm] |
and oh god I love the forever 21 in union square. I feel like every time I go to the one in salem new hampshire and the rockingham mall there's pretty much a lot of shit.
although I admit that I'm wearing a dress from there right now. but really! |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 5th, 2008|03:12 pm] |
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oh and in the pratt bulletin it suggests that a student should set aside an allowance of $800 for living expenses. uh, that's certainly at least $200 less than what I pull after taxes in a month. looks like they know grad students live in abject poverty anyway. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 5th, 2008|03:01 pm] |
um, so the sound doesn't work on my computer anymore? I love new york and the program at pratt and my heart is set on applying, being accepted into, and starting school there in february. rents for room in brooklyn on craigslist look very goddamn similar is perhaps who knows a tad more reasonable then here in boston. I'd work full time and go to school part time (the girl who works in the office said that almost all the students in the program go part time). perhaps cvs would pay me more when I live in new york or I could have many more opportunities at a hospital or another chain.
new york is on a completely different plane than boston and it's a plane I want to be on.
I fooled around with someone in new york. I joked to eric that I was my own sister carrie (I just finished reading that amazing book). I think I've been giving liam some indication in the past that I'm looking outside of what we have. which is more dating than relationship. and he's been fine, but I might be getting myself more and more into the position where I don't want to go into full detail about what I'm doing though it's not like I'm looking to have unprotected full on coitus with someone else and he's withdrawn more.
also, cheap clothes and shoes are far more plentiful in new york than here. the streets are more alive. happy hour is legal so many I ahem would start going to a bar everyday instead of a cafe. a 3 dollar sierra nevada uh is not more expensive than an iced coffee at 1369. I'm feeling it. I want it. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 3rd, 2008|04:22 pm] |
I somehow secured an informational interview with a day's notice at pratt for tomorrow.
so this is really happening, huh? |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 3rd, 2008|02:39 pm] |
dude! 700 on math and 620 on verbal (weird? but I'll take it) I stand a chance of getting a 6 or something close to it on the essay I'm pretty sure. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 2nd, 2008|09:30 pm] |
oh and yes I bought a lot of books. far too many goddamn books when I have far too many goddamn books in the first place.
geesh. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 2nd, 2008|09:26 pm] |
I bought a godawful lot of stuff in the last week. like 250 in bags, wallet, jacket, shoes, and a skirt. I almost never buy stuff like that and I sort of feel nervous about it (but not too much. especially when that economic stimulus check comes my way.) and overall it's not so much money since I threw away a bunch of stuff worth at least about half that much recently that I have acquired over the years (and pretty much used into the ground).
certainly weird to buy that much stuff though and much of it is more feminine than what I've had in the past. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 1st, 2008|11:02 pm] |
oh god, I don't even really study all that much (I don't have to) and tomorrow begins the first real day of my vacation (the weekend is the weekend is the weekend and there's another to follow before I have to work again). will I deal? |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 31st, 2008|01:50 pm] |
I just took another princton review test and got a 630 on math and a 730 on verbal. jesus!
that's 50 points better than I did on the SAT and far better than I've gotten on practice GREs so far. I gotta think it's a fluke, but it makes me want the actual gre to be a fluke too. |
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| personal notes on practice gre scores |
[May. 26th, 2008|12:37 pm] |
first out of two available ets tests: 550 on both math and verbal
free kaplan test: 520 on math and 610 on verbal
well all right. and both times I had like ten more minutes remaining on each section (geesh!) so I guess I could work on spending more time on the problems. it seems like I get stressed out really quickly and just choose whatever looks close enough to an answer with out making absolutely sure especially when I have all that time left over. |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 19th, 2008|09:04 pm] |
david winstead is engaged. of course I can't claim to have ever really known him at all in our decade of infrequent acquaintance, but wow man, just wow.
I think I still hold at least a tiny torch for him all these years. smaller than the small torch I still tote around for swift, which in and of itself isn't that important.
still. |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 21st, 2008|06:51 pm] |
2 out of the 4 schools that I sent an email to inquiring about whether or not I can send a gre score report to them before applying said no I can't. shit. I'm sure that's what they will all say. whatever I guess 10 bucks a pop is sort of nominal but if I could've gotten out of it. damn.
liam made me upset last night. I guess there are plans on making it up to me tonight. we're not even official yet. eh. |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 21st, 2008|12:10 am] |
I have spent a lot of money today. hopefully well.
I bought another jonathan ames book, origins toner, pipe screens, two pairs of legging (to wear with skirts and make up for not having or being able to attain more corduroys), paid for a test date, bought a used copy of pee-wee playhouse's second volume for liam for cheap, bought two douglas hofstedter books (one famously intense that I think even liam hasn't fully read somehow though it's his type and these books will probably play a stark contrast against all the serious fiction I will be attempting), some testing guides that strike me as a bit more helpful than what I borrowed from my sister to kill myself with in the last half of may. a couple iced drinks at the 1369 and then I spent the last of the day bored out of my fucking skull.
I think liam must've accidentally napped again today but I'm sure I'll hear about it. the whole things new, hopefully there won't be a sudden uproar.
I'm soaring through anna karenina but sometimes the brain just can't stand it after 300 pages in two days.
war and peace looked like an unimaginable brick. thank god I did not find it used today.
I think most of what I bought was useful. I'm certain it is. I suppose without having scheduled my exam it would even be considered normal. |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 14th, 2008|10:54 pm] |
almost obscene obsession with bath and body works specifically (moderate end skin products in general) because of their insane coupons. must desist from buying unless I actually need more body butter (mm. body butter... huh?) because there is no way I'll use up six handsoaps in a month.
ditch a year old bottle of loreal drugstore moisturizer and a cvs zit remover that had grown shady lately (a month before its expiration date) and for some reason got the bright idea to buy new stuff at origins. I frowned when my request for advice on a moisturizer kept getting turned into things more costly that I felt comfortable with but I think I'm pretty happy.
sometimes I'm rather vain. at least I don't see myself wearing makeup perpetually or buying fawncy clothes. my morning routine will remain almost extremely low maintenence. it should all take less than five minutes. besides what happens in the bathroom.
what else am I concerned with? the gre I suppose is coming up. I will take it at the beginning of june most likely. liam situation is comfortable.
blargh!? maybe eric will pick up the phone or I could just really drift to sleep.
one thing I never need to buy special care products for... my hair. |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 8th, 2008|10:47 pm] |
I was about to lie down to bed for good tonight after all my rituals and just realized that already in the second week of preparing for the gre, 4 out of 7 days will have me doing much more than trying to work 1 or 2 vocab words in my head (which will happen every day now). I've heard it only gets worse. this will probably go on for as long almost three more months.
I probably won't be able to hang out with anyone at that point!
applying to college will seem almost leisurely afterwards at least for a little while. I don't expect to apply to anything earlier than sept. 2009. man, I just don't know. |
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